Nicholas Kristof Clutches the Pearls

When I was a kid and not permitted to say “no” to well-meaning grownups, I along with my little friends was subjected to the saccharine horror that was “Free To Be … You And Me” featuring Marlo “That Girl” Thomas.  Wikipedia’s description of this 1970s staple:

Using poetry, songs, and sketches, the basic concept was to salute values such as individuality, tolerance, and happiness with one’s identity; a major thematic message is that anyone, whether a boy or a girl, can achieve anything one wants.

All commendable sentiments, of course.  What I always objected to about this exercise in tolerance was not the message, rather that the songs were insipid and, more importantly, that the children who were required to listen to the album and watch the special were usually kids who were being raised in households where these values were being taught anyway.  I’m guessing that, for example, Lucianne Goldberg never sat down with the ghastly Jonah to gently lecture him on the importance of tolerance and inclusion. 

Nicholas Kristof seems to have dusted the LP off recently and given it a spin. How else to explain his weepy shock at the realization that right wing lunatics populate the airwaves, expressing almost comically demented, hysterically bigoted points of view about Barack Obama:
The whispering campaigns allege that Mr. Obama is a secret Muslim planning to impose Islamic law on the country. Incredibly, he is even accused - in earnest! - of being the Antichrist.

Proponents of this theory offer detailed theological explanations for why he is the Antichrist, and the proof is that he claims to be Christian - after all, the Antichrist would say that, wouldn’t he? The rumors circulate enough that Glenn Beck of CNN asked the Rev. John Hagee, a conservative evangelical, what the odds are that Mr. Obama is the Antichrist.

Katie bar the door! Take the key out of the Prius and postpone the trip to Whole Foods!  We need to have a discussion about this!

Even if a prejudice is directed to a matter of choice, like religion or long hair, it’s still prejudice. It’s possible to believe that Catholics have every right to be president while opposing a particular Catholic candidate who would ban contraception; likewise, it’s possible to believe that Muslims have every right to hold office without necessarily embracing the candidacy of particular Muslims who advocate enveloping all women in burkas.

And whose responsibility is it to step in and reverse all this ugliness?  Obama’s opponents of course:

This is a case where Hillary Rodham Clinton and John McCain should take the initiative and denounce the fear-mongering about Mr. Obama as hate speech. The wink-wink references to “Barack Hussein Obama” and lies about his going to a madrassa are the religious equivalent of racial slurs, and Mr. McCain and Mrs. Clinton should denounce them in the strongest terms. This is their chance to show leadership.

And to conclude, my personal favorite:

Martin Luther wasn’t a model of tolerance but even he took the position that, “I’d rather be ruled by a wise Turk than a foolish Christian.” In this presidential campaign, we should at least aspire to be as open-minded as 16th-century Germans.

Let me be rude enough to point out that saying that Martin Luther “wasn’t a model of tolerance” is, ahem, a bit of an understatement.  This is the man, after all, who in his book “On the Jews and Their Lies” (subtle? Sure), wrote that Jews were “(a) base, whoring people, that is, no people of God, and their boast of lineage, circumcision, and law must be accounted as filth.” They are full of the “devil’s feces … which they wallow in like swine,” and the synagogue is an “incorrigible whore and an evil slut ..”  So maybe encouraging his readers to be as open-minded as 16th century Germans is not quite the way to make your point about tolerance.
But now it’s time to cut the bullshit here.

Nicholas Kristof is far from being a stupid man.  Much to his credit, he was a tireless advocate for rape victim Mukhtaran Mai, focusing the attention of the world on this poor woman’s hideous case. 

But when it comes to US politics as seen through his Obama beer goggles, the man has regurgitated a big glop of stupid.

Where was Nicholas Kristoff during the Republican primaries in South Carolina in 2000?  During Max Cleland’s 2002 bid for reelection?  During the 2004 Swift Boat/John Kerry is French smearapalooza?  Does Nicholas Kristoff really believe we’ve seen the worst of this campaign season?  Is he a journalist or a stenographer with amensia?  Does he think the Republican drive by character assassins who orchestrated these grim political greatest hits have signed on to the Free To Be … You and Me school of linking arms, hugging, acceptance and tolerance?  Doesn’t he realize that this reference to ’Barack Hussein Obama’ is the canape that precedes the banquet of excrement to come?

And why, may I ask, if Glenn Beck and John Hagee were exchanging views on whether or not Obama is the Antichrist, do Clinton and McCain have to step in and demand that these bounders fight by the Marquess of Queensbury rules? 

The point is that Obama’s acolytes, toadies, apostles and court historians need to shake off the goddamned fairy dust once and for all and realize that the Republicans are not now fucking around, nor have they been known to fuck around in the past. They want to win.  You all may think that Barack Obama is such a nice young man, but when Republicans look at him they see a target - or a bothersome obstacle. So get used to it.  The closer we get to November being called the Antichrist will seem like a tickling competition.